Few topics have inspired me to write LESS than this one is doing.

I went to the U.K. for the first time back in 2015 and since then, I've spent nearly 2 years total on that beloved island. I've made almost all of my favorite memories with my favorite people there and up until very recently, I've rarely had a bad experience there (other than my Green Motion catastrophe LOL) - up until recently being the operative phrase there.

Before I begin, allow me to preface this with - nothing terrible happened. This isn't a story of any piping tea, but rather some pretty tepid tea - in fact, tepid would be a pretty good descriptor of the whole trip, frankly. But despite this story being lame overall, I know I need to tell it. So here goes -

Two weeks ago James and I set off on our first REAL vacation together as a married couple back to the U.K. to visit his family and do a little tourist-ing. From booking onward, I had mixed feelings about the trip - half of me was so excited and the other half had my apprehensions, but I was open-minded and excited for Nandos, so I soldiered on.

Day of the trip arrives and James and I are in amazing spirits. The travel to the airport went exceptionally well and we were packed and prepared for what we were expecting to be an amazing flight. It wasn’t. I think the plane we boarded should have been retired 5 years ago, but if even if it had been more modern and comfortable, our feverish flight attendant (yeah, he actually said to his co-worker that he was coming down with something because he couldn't stop PROFUSELY SWEATING as he served us food and drinks), James losing his kindle in the seat, me breaking my headphones trying to watch a movie, and the airline running out of non-curry meals for me to eat as they served the last one to person next to me, all combined would have still made for a rough flight.

Upon arrival in London, we were exhausted, but not about to let the lack of sleep break us this early in the trip, so we hopped in our adorable little Fiat 500 and zipped down to James' part of the country.

Now, those who know me know that there are only a few people on earth that I respect and idolize as much as Jeremy Clarkson. He means a lot to me and my family, and always has. If you want to argue that philosophy in the comments, you can save your energy, respectfully. Which brings us to our first stop on the journey - Diddly Squat Farm. This was a special moment for me for so many reasons. I stepped foot on Jeremy's land and immediately broke down in tears. I can't thank James enough for making my dream of visiting come true. We shopped a little in his shop and took in the beautiful sights before heading on our way, but it is a memory I won't soon forget - and considering my abnormally poor memory, that's saying something.

Next we had dinner with James' Grandmother, Great Aunt, and both of their lovely partners. This was also an utterly wonderful experience. You might be wondering where the mediocrity comes in, but don't worry, it's coming - it's going to be a long one.

Dinner was ABSOLUTELY DELICIOUS. If you're ever in the area, make sure to stop into The Lion at Tredington for a meal because neither of us have had a meal quite that lovely in a very long time. We had a marvelous time and then a marvelous dessert. It was so, so nice to catch up with the four of them. It truly warmed my heart in a way that I haven't felt since I spent time with my own grandmother who I lost many years ago.

But that's where the warm fuzzies end, I'm afraid.

After that was a few days of sight-seeing in the area and the seeing of other family James and I haven't in more than a year. James' mom showed us around an incredible dilapidated castle and some quaint and picturesque English villages, which I'm so grateful for.

But as much as spending time with all the members of his family was really nice, I think the gods above were just determined to throw wrench after wrench in our vacation gears. The weather was cold and rainy and on our day out, for no apparent reason, so many places were closed making finding food or other necessities incredibly difficult - small town life, am I right? I badly stained three different pieces of my (already tiny) wardrobe, ended up with a pretty gnarly ear-ache from the ultra-cold wind, and struggled from place to place to find my cream teas that I'd been craving and looking forward to because they were consistently sold out or full of strange ingredients that just ruined the eating experience for me.

And speaking of ruined eating experiences, we’d been planning for weeks to treat our in-laws to a cheeky chippy take away on our second night there. So obliging us, James’ mom put her steak pies back in the freezer and since no good deed goes un-punished, come dinner time we got to the shop expecting to find a similar steak pie for me to eat, but we didn’t, and I ended up having to make an emergency run into town because their menu had little else for picky-old-me on it.

After a few days of bad luck and poor sleep, we cheered our sister-in-law on at the Stratford-upon-Avon half-marathon and then headed down to Wales where the fun (and FML moments) continued.

Our road trip down was fine, albeit 4 hours too long. We listened to Taylor's TTPD the whole way, which was also a bit of a disappointment if you ask me, but that's an analysis for another post. Upon arrival in Cardiff we were smacked pretty hard in the face with the cost of living crisis that is hitting the U.K. so hard right now. Most of the beautiful downtown that I remember from 9 years ago was closed down and looking rough. It made both of us really sad to see such a lovely place struggling, as I know so many others are across the country. Our hotel was nice and so was Cardiffian Nandos - currently ranking on my top 3, if anyone's wondering - and then we hit the hay to prepare for our second-to-last day there.

The following day was, without question, our favorite day of the trip. We toured South Wales, castle hunting and made our way to both Swansea and Barry Island, two places neither of us had ever been, but absolutely loved. All of Wales was so lovely to see. I couldn’t get enough of Carreg Cennen Castle and Caerphilly Castle - they both totally stole my heart and so did the delicious cream tea I finally got to have (after the two other failed attempts).

We went out on the town that night and had the best time just chatting and getting tipsy together. It was a wonderful day and Wales will forever have a special place in my heart for those memories.

On our last day, we drove back across the country to Warner Brothers Studios to go on the Harry Potter tour, which was a cool as you would probably expect. James didn't walk away with his wand like he wanted because their selection was depressingly limited, but we did try Butter Beer, which is an iconic moment for all millennials and Harry Potter fans alike.

However, while we were there, the gods had one more laugh at our expense. See, while James was especially geeked for the HP tour, I was especially geeked for our accommodation that night - we were booked at a big brick estate that I picked specifically for how beautiful it was. Ten steps before we walked into the studio, we received a call from the hotel that they had overbooked for a conference and were bumping our reservation. I was crushed. We were relocated to another fancy estate property which was sufficiently nice, but it just wasn't the same. Not for nothing, it's also worth nothing that upon our arrival at the new hotel, we learned their booking system was totally down and they had no record of us even staying there, which caused yet another headache that we had to struggle through. At this point, we were spent. We had one final Nandos dinner and one final sleep before we packed up and left.

Our flight home thankfully wasn't another red eye, but we didn't end up back at our place until after 11pm and we had work the next day - as if we weren't already tired enough.

Whatever - it's over now. You win some; you lose some. Lessons were learned and you'll never see me leave the country without ear muffs or fly Virgin Atlantic again.

Xoxoxoxox

Write on!